Wedding Etiquette: Who Pays for the Wedding?
Getting married can be very costly. For brides, it is best to talk to your husband to be about the wedding budget before you start booking services like car hire, reception center, shopping for your wedding gown and the bridesmaids outfits, booking beauticians, hairstylists or seeing a wedding coordinator.
Before you decide to act in a demanding way or mimic the actions of those lovely ladies on “Bridezilla” t.v. show you will need to determine who is going to pay for your wedding and who will cover the largest percentage of your wedding budget.
Below are the wedding etiquette on who pays or should pay for your wedding. This will serve as a guide for couples who would like to know the basic etiquette in who pays for what.
Traditional Wedding Etiquette.
Who Pays For the Wedding?
Wedding Etiquette on who pays for the weddings has evolved for the last century.
Traditionally, wedding etiquette books dictate that the bride’s father should pay for the wedding.
This was during the time when girls were kept by their fathers inside their house, not allowed to work and go to school, but do household chores and must have lessons on how to behave as a lady and observe the appropriate manners.
The mother and father of the bride were responsible for teaching their daughter the correct social etiquette and wedding etiquette in preparation for their life as married woman.
A daughter was ‘given’ out by her father to the man who the father thought could feed or fend his daughter when he was gone.
Since he would be giving his daughter away, he would host his daughter’s wedding and pay for everything as a sign of his agreement to his daughter’s marriage.
This is the traditional wedding etiquette on who pays for the wedding.
Who Pays For the Wedding?
Modern Wedding Etiquette.
In recent times the wedding etiquette on who pays for the wedding is not as rigid as it was before. The bride and the groom can go traditional, and thus should ask the father of the bride to host the wedding and pay for the entire wedding expenses.
Or if the parents of the groom have expressed their desire to be a co-host of the wedding event, they may do so, especially if the parents of the groom are wealthy and are able to cover some of the expenses.
But since most couples nowadays are both earning their own money, it is not a violation of wedding etiquette if the bride and the groom decide to pay for their own wedding.
Many couples prefer to pay for the their own wedding so that they can have more control over the whole wedding day. They can also have a good deal of control the number of guests and who is invited to spend this very special day with them.
Most of the time the wedding etiquette on who pays for the wedding is being set aside to grant the wishes of the couple and immediate family members.
Alternative Ways of Paying – Wedding Etiquette.
Because of the high cost of living these days, paying for the entire cost of the wedding may be beyond the means of the parents of the bride or even of the parents of the groom.
If the bride and the groom are earning money for themselves, they may consider paying for the entire expenses for the wedding day.
However, there may be parents who would like to contribute to the wedding cost.
Brides and grooms should be sensitive with this matter. Don’t say no to your parents, they will want to contribute. They like to help you get started in life and you should be able to negotiate either a percentage or give them specific things to pay for, such as the wedding cake, the photographer and wedding video. Many parents get very excited about the planning of a wedding and this is a way they can be involved without letting them take full responsibility for the wedding costs.
It is a great idea to sit down with both the bride and groom’s parents talk about the wedding budget and suggest where you would like some help with paying for specific services or wedding items or if you would prefer for the parents to pay a percentage of the wedding costs. Make sure you have at least a basic idea about what each item or service is likely to cost.
Ask them how much they can comfortably afford. This way, your parents will have an idea of the exact amount that they will feel comfortable to pay while the bride and groom, will know how much is it that you still need to raise.
Wedding etiquette on who pays for what is not anymore big question these days. The only etiquette that is required of bride and groom is to talk out with their parents about who pays only if the parents have voiced desire to co-host the wedding affair.
We at mother of the bride speech hope you have gained some useful information about the wedding etiquette, who pays for the wedding.






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